Accident Waiting To Happen

I am an accident waiting to happen. I swear, it's like a cloud that hangs over me. Some might say that I am just not careful enough. Others might say it's something more powerful. A force, if you will.

Bruises, scrapes, stitches, butterfly bandages, road rash, dog bite, emergency surgery; been there, and done them all. Here are some highlights, in a mostly chronological order;

Dropped scissors into my leg - butterfly bandage (Dad)
Fell off my bike - stitches in my chin (ER)
Fell partially through a wharf - one leg stuck & bruised
Cut my fingers carving a pumpkin - stitches (ER)
Bitten by a dog - large gaping wound, no stitches (& no Dr. in the fucking ER) - 6 weeks to heal
Sliced head open on a locker handle - stitches (ER)
Took a softball line drive in the shin - twice in one week, same spot - permanent bruise & chunk missing from shin bone.
Crashed an ATC (my fault, bad judgement) - tore my ACL, soft tissue damage - Dr., Physio Therapy - permanent damage
Emergency appendectomy - 5 hrs undiagnosed in ER, then 5 hours undiagnosed in a second ER the following day, followed by admittance to yet another hospital, finally diagnosed with a ruptured appendix - 8 days in the hospital - major surgery
Stepped on a nail - tetanus shot (ER), combined with breaking 1 toe (both, within 10 days of completing a two day - 60k walk)
Various burns - frying pans, lamps, oven, etc. etc.
Screw driven into and through thumb nail - did it yesterday and it fucking hurts!
Numerous sprains & twists, bursitis, tendinitis and a rotator cuff injury.

Yes, it feels like about 80% of the time I am injured, recovering from an injury or about to be injured.

Wonder what tomorrow will bring?