.ca vs .com

"The Websense category "Sex" is filtered"

Well, there you have it. A message that blocks my access to my little place on the net, as it were. I’m not blocked everywhere, just from work.

I think it has to do, not with what is at the site I’m trying to access, but what lies at a similarly named site, save for the .ca vs .com.

So, for the sake of 2 letters I am denied access to my little happy place. I hope this passes. Good thing I still have access to the help wanted classifies...

I've Got Your Number....

...and I'm calling it!

That's right! If you're foolish enough to drive like a moron with your company's name & number all over your vehicle, then I'm going to give them a jingle. I've recently taken to calling up bus and taxi dispatchers to tell them exactly how badly some of their drivers are representing their company in the real world.

Mr. Taxi driver, who changed lanes through the marked crosswalk, and Mr. Bus driver, who made no less than 6 lanes changes in a 1 km stretch of highway, you are both morons, however your dispatchers are lovely people who took the time to listen to me complain about your foolishness.

So, you there, in the company vehicles, who are driving like knobs...I've got your number and I'm going to use it.

"Baby On Board"

You've seen the signs. Surely you have. They're everywhere, on practically every vehicle. Baby on Board..Child in Car, you get the idea.

What I want to know is what are you hoping will happen when you display that sign? What's the purpose? What are you trying to achieve?

By all means, display your plastic signs if you like but the way I see it there are two kinds of drivers out there on the roads with you and your signs;

1) The type of driver who goes about their business, drives like a normal person, understands the rules of the road, pays attention to what goes on around them and wouldn't intentionally place another’s vehicle in harms way. These people are aware.

2) The type of driver who behaves like “me first” at any cost, I want what I want when I want it and I don’t care who’s in my way or what I have to do to get there and I’m more important than you. A common bully. These people have no concern for the wellbeing of others, are ignorant, opportunistic and oblivious.

By my calculations the type “1” driver is not going to change their style because of the type of passengers you carry in your car. They’re already doing the right thing by you on the road, regardless of who is in your vehicle.

The type “2” driver is a fucktard, unwilling or unable to respect other people and they have no clue how reckless they are. There is no reforming these people and they do not give a shit about anybody but themselves. Period.

My Cruise Control Reveals Your Lack Of Driving Skill

My current vehicle has cruise control & is an automatic. Two features I’ve never had in a vehicle before. I went from changing gears and accelerating on my own to a vehicle that could practically drive itself and only recently have chosen to sometimes relinquish speed control. Hell, I'm behind the wheel so I might as well do something.

While highway driving it is just amazing to me how bad some people are at maintaining a consistent speed and I would not really realize it if it were not for the cruise control. I set my speed and go while others are speeding up and slowing down all over the place. I’m constantly on the brakes or changing lanes to accommodate for the inconsistent or otherwise incompetent. I wonder if I used to be like that? Actually, I don't care if I was. Now everybody else is really annoying me!

NARDS!!!

It’s an old expression that resurfaced in my vocabulary this past weekend. I don’t recall exactly what it meant back in the day, but this weekend it referred to a combination of “knobs” & “retards” on the road. Gawd there were so many of them I can’t even recall the specifics now…except for one…

This past weekend a friend & I went Stateside for a daylong shopping trip, with the majority of the trip being highway driving. On the return trip we encountered the subject of this post. A young lady in a blue Rav 4, pretty obviously a new driver based on her “10 & 2” hand positioning, was also headed home. I drive at the speed limit or a little bit above it, and so generally I’m passing people, or at minimum, moving with the flow of traffic. Being an experienced driver I know to watch the road ahead for slow pokes, on/off ramps & the popo. The young lady was not as savvy…nowhere near in fact.

I set the cruise and we headed on our merry way home. I’m well aware of the law about keeping right except to pass, but as I was doing just above the speed limit, myself and about ½ the others on the road were in the left lane, moving along quite nicely and likely using cruise control.

So I’m driving along in the fast lane, going with the flow of traffic, and Miss Rav 4 is behind me in the slow lane, advancing quite rapidly, only to be slowed by traffic merging from an onramp, and so over she comes into the fast lane, gets by the mergers and back over to the slow lane. And again, she advances quickly up to almost beside me, and again, is slowed by traffic in the slow lane. This time she clues in and stays in the fast lane and is moving along behind me, but then her speed drops off and she slides back over to the slow lane. Then her speed picks up and again she sling shots herself back up beside me, to the point where I think she’s actually going to pass me this time, but alas, again she is slowed by the merging traffic. She swings over to the fast lane, only to find herself going slower than the merging traffic, and so she slides back over to the slow lane. And so it went…continually…for upwards of 30 miles. She actually became a distraction to my driving and it became a game for my passenger and I to guess when Miss Rav 4 would make her next lane change. I swear she made no less than 50 lane changes in about 20 miles, always ending up directly behind me. And so, if you see a young lady in a blue Rav 4, license plate 898 HCX, considered yourself warned and enjoy the sport of watching her flounder about as we did.

Random Morons

Friday, August 11th – to the moron driving the red Pacific Salmon Commission vehicle; the HOV lane is for 3+ people in your vehicle. It’s not there so that “special” people, alone in their vehicle like you, can go faster than the rest of us.

Since I don’t think you’re capable of behaving like a normal person, how about you save the fucktard driving for your own personal vehicle, and not when you’re out driving the MARKED Pacific Salmon Commission car. Moron!

Monday, August 14th - to the moron driving the white Chevy p/u, license plate 1984 HX – in order for me to know that you want to merge, you have to;

a) be ahead of me and
b) use your indicator so that I can see what it is you want.

Thanks for just about sideswiping me this morning to indicate your lane preference. I’ll be watching for you next time and if you try that shit again we are going to meet. Moron!

"N" = Not Very Good At This

A few notes;

• to the "N"ew driver in the green p/u from this morning; that sweeping 3-lane change you think you smoothly executed at 120k...yeah, not so much. You left a sea of evasive driving maneuveres and brake lights in your wake, asshole

• that space on the outside of the single lane is called a "shoulder". It is not an extra lane made just for you to drive in. Get the fuck back behind me and wait your damned turn, you knob

• I get that you're in a hurry, but to ride someones ass until they make their turn and to then floor it through the RED light was so not cool

“Please Leave Me Feedback”

eBay sellers of the world, I’m fucking sick and tired of getting this request from some of you! I’m not much into eBay but when I’m there I am most often a buyer. From the way I’ve been spoken to lately it seems “feedback” is now a hotly guarded commodity, very precious and not to be given unless you get it first. WTF?

As with most things in this world, there is a natural progression through most eBay transactions. The seller lists an item. The highest bidder at the end is successful, and must pay for the item. The seller will then ship the item. The receiver then acknowledges receipt of said item. Here’s where things go awfully wrong, IMO.

1.If, as the buyer, I pay you and you deem my payment to be satisfactory, then I have fulfilled my obligation as a buyer and you ought to leave me feedback for making proper payment.

2. Once I receive the item you send me and I deem it to be as described and shipped in a timely manner, then I should leave feedback for you, for fulfilling your obligations as a seller.

What’s happening now is that the minute I make payment, but before the item is received, I get email from morons sellers, the likes of the following;

“Thank you for purchasing “X”. Please leave feedback for me on eBay and I'll do the same for you. Take this opportunity now and help build a better eBay community.”

And these 3 gems, all from “Gary”;

“I will ship out your package today please give feedback and I will do the same."
“Hi, don't forget feedback”
“I don't give feedback anymore ahead of time because out of 30 feedbacks that I give I get only 10 back this is from past experience. I always give feedback to those who give me feedback.”

Fuck off already and quit sniveling for feedback when I haven’t even received fucking item yet! Give your head a shake! It should be enough that I am, once again, yelling “what the hell was that” into thin air as I read these messages, but alas, I can no longer let it go and I have to respond;

“I haven't forgotten feedback, but it seems you might have overlooked leaving me feedback upon your receipt of my payment. I fully intend to leave you positive feedback as ours was a smooth transaction. Please extend me the same courtesy.”

“Hi Gary,

That you presume to judge me on the deeds of others bothers me to no end. As I have never wronged you I am appalled that you’ve given yourself the right to call into question my integrity.

It is my belief that the feedback tool should be used by members as a transaction progresses chronologically. Once a portion of the transaction is completed the quality of it should be reported on, i.e. feedback left. I feel it’s a logical position to take as well as an honorable way in which to conduct business.
Regardless of how I feel about the position you’ve taken with regard to holding feedback hostage, the fact of the matter (and we should both be dealing with the facts) is that ours was a smooth transaction, and as such I have left you feedback to that effect, as I always indicated I would.

What a disheartening end to an otherwise lovely transaction.”

You know what? I get that feedback = reputation, and that some people in this world will screw you over for a nickel, but get over it already. It’s not important enough to beg for, and how dare you even bring up me leaving you feedback when I’ve already paid you and you haven’t even shipped the damn thing out to me! Quit wasting my fucking time. I have better things to do than tune-up the likes of you!

The Arrogance of Entitlement

Who the hell do you think you are and what the hell was that? How the hell to some clowns decide that their time and their life is more valuable than mine? I mean really, I must have missed the fucking memo, because clearly you are far and above the rest of us, you dinks! Picture this; you're driving downhill on winding single lane highway, with signs everywhere saying "do not pass". The oncoming traffic coming up the winding highway has two lanes. You get that it's winding, right? There's a slow moving vehicle (semi, 5th wheel, bus or what not) crawling down the hill with a line of traffic backing up behind. If you're behind the slow mover then the right thing to do is take a deep breath, drop down a gear or two and suck it up while waiting for a passing lane, or for the guy to pull over or for the solid double line to become a broken line, at which time you might be able to safely pull out to pass. Did any of the above happen today, uhhhhh...no. Instead of driving like normal people, no less than 6 drivers decided that they were entitled to take lives into their own hands and pass the slow mover by pulling into the oncoming lane, with oncoming traffic veering out of the way, so that they, the arrogant bastards that they are, didn't have to be inconvenienced. And I'm not just talking about the usual testosterone laden sports car that sling shots out of nowhere, I'm talking about pick-up trucks hauling trailers. Come on you assholes! What the fuck is that about? I don't give a rats ass if you crash and burn in a pile by yourself, but how superior you must be to take those chances with other people's lives? Arrrggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

I would have posted the license plate numbers of all the jackasses I encountered today, but I think that would have been too much of a burden for Blogger.

My American friends, particularly those drivers from Washington State. I have been to your lovely State and seen the informative highway signs that say "keep right except to pass". It's the law in your State, and good idea here too. So why on earth do you feel the need to drive in the left lane, below the posted speed limit, when the ever so empty right lane is available for your use? Why?

So Here's The Thing...

If I have to adjust what I'm doing in order not to hit you, then you've done something wrong. I'm talking about lane changes, backing up, turning, etc. If you make a turn and can't get up to speed before I am on your ass, then you've made a bad choice. It's really as simple as that. I'm not talking about places where traffic has to merge, because hello, dumbasses, that means we have to work together to get two lanes smoothly turned into one, and I am onboard with that alternating thing. However, if I have to hit the brakes or take evasive driving maneuvers, while yelling "What the hell was that!!!" then you are in my bad books and may well make it into this blog.

As an aside, merge & yield signs do not mean the same thing, but I'll get into that another time.