Sunday, September 24, 2006
You're Not The Only Ones
This is to the morons who abandon their shopping carts in the middle of store aisles, with their kids & their grandparents in tow; you're not the only ones in the store! I'm sick and fucking tired of waiting for you to realise that you are causing a traffic jam. I'm also sick of pushing your fucking shopping carts out of the way so that I and others can get by. There are other people in the store. It's not just about you. Wake the fuck up!
You Miserable Cow!
Last week I was driving through a parking lot in Washington State when I had an experience that makes me wonder how some people were raised. I was looking for a parking spot and had located someone who was backing out. In order to get to my intended spot I needed to cross in front of oncoming traffic, and because I have manners, I decided not to cut-off the Lexus that was heading in my direction. I signaled my intention and waited for them to drive by, but alas, the Lexus driver was not raised to have manners...
"You miserable cow!", is what I hollered out my window in the direction of said Lexus, as the driver pulled into my intended parking spot. Thanks a lot you weathered old bag! Who the hell taught you to be like that???
I have not totally given up hope that there are still some considerate people out there, but the grey haired bag driving the silver Lexus, with the Washington State license plate 761 FRS, sure as hell ain't one of 'em. Old enough to know better, indeed.
"You miserable cow!", is what I hollered out my window in the direction of said Lexus, as the driver pulled into my intended parking spot. Thanks a lot you weathered old bag! Who the hell taught you to be like that???
I have not totally given up hope that there are still some considerate people out there, but the grey haired bag driving the silver Lexus, with the Washington State license plate 761 FRS, sure as hell ain't one of 'em. Old enough to know better, indeed.
99% Of The Way There
I was out shopping today and observed a woman unload her shopping cart into her vehicle and walk the cart over to quite near where the carts are supposed to be returned to. But instead of turning the cart so it would be in line with the rest of the carts, she just left it in front of the line. She was 99% of the way there. Why the hell didn't she just turn the cart? I don't understand going to that much effort and then to stop at the very last possible moment. Odd.
Monday, September 11, 2006
Tap.............................Tap
This morning I arrived at work a little bit early, as is the norm since school went back in and I need to leave earlier to beat avoid the masses. I was in the parking lot reading my newspaper when a vehicle parked beside me. I made note that it was the Sales manager and resumed reading my paper.
He got out of his SUV and closed the front door. He then went to the driver’s side rear door and opened it, presumably to get his briefcase etc. That was when I felt it. *tap*
I stopped reading and asked myself, “Did he just hit my vehicle with his door?” I looked in my sideview mirror and it sure looked like his door was touching my door. Buuuuut, then discounted it, because surely he saw me sitting in my vehicle and would not do such a thing while I was right there, and maybe it was just my imagination. And then it happened again. *tap*
Ok, now I knew it had happened, twice in fact, and the question now became, do I have that most uncomfortable conversation and call him out on it, or do I play it safe and let it go.
Fuck it! This is the kind of shit that usually happens with no witnesses and you, like I, usually return to find your door dented or some paint scrape left by an inconsiderate knob.
So….after another second of consideration I opened my rear passenger window, greeted him and asked him to please not hit my vehicle with his door.
He said “I didn’t”.
I said “You did…twice…and I felt it”.
He said, shaking his head all the while, “Then I’m sorry. I made an effort not to”, in a tone that suggested it was better to just say sorry than argue. Clearly he did not think he had hit me in the slightest.
Honestly, it was not the level of contact that would likely result in body or paint damage, but it shouldn’t have happened in the first place.
This is the kind of thing that I would probably have just let slide in the past. And considering just how uncomfortable it has potentially now made my working relationship with this person, maybe that’s just what I should have done. But I’m just not that person anymore.
He got out of his SUV and closed the front door. He then went to the driver’s side rear door and opened it, presumably to get his briefcase etc. That was when I felt it. *tap*
I stopped reading and asked myself, “Did he just hit my vehicle with his door?” I looked in my sideview mirror and it sure looked like his door was touching my door. Buuuuut, then discounted it, because surely he saw me sitting in my vehicle and would not do such a thing while I was right there, and maybe it was just my imagination. And then it happened again. *tap*
Ok, now I knew it had happened, twice in fact, and the question now became, do I have that most uncomfortable conversation and call him out on it, or do I play it safe and let it go.
Fuck it! This is the kind of shit that usually happens with no witnesses and you, like I, usually return to find your door dented or some paint scrape left by an inconsiderate knob.
So….after another second of consideration I opened my rear passenger window, greeted him and asked him to please not hit my vehicle with his door.
He said “I didn’t”.
I said “You did…twice…and I felt it”.
He said, shaking his head all the while, “Then I’m sorry. I made an effort not to”, in a tone that suggested it was better to just say sorry than argue. Clearly he did not think he had hit me in the slightest.
Honestly, it was not the level of contact that would likely result in body or paint damage, but it shouldn’t have happened in the first place.
This is the kind of thing that I would probably have just let slide in the past. And considering just how uncomfortable it has potentially now made my working relationship with this person, maybe that’s just what I should have done. But I’m just not that person anymore.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
School's Back In
Doesn't mean as much as it did when I was actually in school, but I do notice it. It inconveniences me. More bodies milling about, more morons on the road, those who wouldn't "normally" venture out do, and they are clueless. Hopefully everyone will settle the hell down in the next few weeks and my commute can get back to normal.
Have you noticed the skirts of private school girls? What the hell is up with the skirts? I know the stereotypical male fantasy about the school girl costume, but I'll be damned if the real thing isn't almost pornographic. And you know what? If you're an adult and you want to wear crotch revealing skirts...well, then I guess that's your prerogative, but I'm talking about girls. 12 & 13 years old. Hell, it would be wrong at 17 years old, but I digress.
Why the hell don't the parents or someone at the schools take a look at the uniforms and realize that these children are walking about advertising their goods? Eye catching indeed.
Have you noticed the skirts of private school girls? What the hell is up with the skirts? I know the stereotypical male fantasy about the school girl costume, but I'll be damned if the real thing isn't almost pornographic. And you know what? If you're an adult and you want to wear crotch revealing skirts...well, then I guess that's your prerogative, but I'm talking about girls. 12 & 13 years old. Hell, it would be wrong at 17 years old, but I digress.
Why the hell don't the parents or someone at the schools take a look at the uniforms and realize that these children are walking about advertising their goods? Eye catching indeed.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
How Fast Do You Think You Are?
How fast must you think your vehicle to be to pull out in front of me when I'm going highway speed and you, you are starting from a standstill?
Happened this past weekend on a major highway. There were literally 2 seconds between me and the person ahead of me, each of us doing 100k/hr and somehow you decided that there was enough room for you to get in the act. WRONG!!!!
Likewise, on the way home today on the highway, my lane was moving along at speed, the other lane at a standstill due to left turn lane backup. What the hell were you thinking, pulling out of your lane and into mine? Did you not see me? I'll answer that one for ya, and no you did not. If you had you wouldn't have done it. You drive a sub-compact piece of shit and I drive an Explorer, with extraordinary brakes, as evidenced by the fact that I did not paste you. I wasn't real fond of the screeching and the fishtailing, but I figured that would be better than scraping the mess off of my grill. You should be dead.
Unless you're packing a hit of nitrous and are going to use it, don't do that shit.
Where's my amnesty day?
Happened this past weekend on a major highway. There were literally 2 seconds between me and the person ahead of me, each of us doing 100k/hr and somehow you decided that there was enough room for you to get in the act. WRONG!!!!
Likewise, on the way home today on the highway, my lane was moving along at speed, the other lane at a standstill due to left turn lane backup. What the hell were you thinking, pulling out of your lane and into mine? Did you not see me? I'll answer that one for ya, and no you did not. If you had you wouldn't have done it. You drive a sub-compact piece of shit and I drive an Explorer, with extraordinary brakes, as evidenced by the fact that I did not paste you. I wasn't real fond of the screeching and the fishtailing, but I figured that would be better than scraping the mess off of my grill. You should be dead.
Unless you're packing a hit of nitrous and are going to use it, don't do that shit.
Where's my amnesty day?
THE Corner
Do you have a place where bad things repeatedly happen to you while you're driving? I do. It's the corner just up from my house. It has become THE corner. The one where people try and kill me.
My street would be considered the main street and the intersection concerned involves a short 1-block street, notably close to several schools. Countless times while I am driving down my street have jackasses pulled out of the short street and right into my path. I really cannot count the number of times I have almost been hit at this intersection. People pull out, turning left and directly into my path. People pull out to turn right and totally cut me off, to the point where I am at a dead stop in the intersection, wondering "what the hell was that?".
I've taken to driving on the wrong side of the street as I pass by this intersection, if only to allow myself more time to evade the fucktards who will inevitably pull out from the short street. I also make a point of taking a deep breath as I approach, just so I won't be caught thinking about breathing while I evade the next jerk-off to come barreling at me. It has changed who I am, it pisses me off and I'm tired of the anxiety.
I'm waiting for my day of amnesty so I can say "fuck it" and just take the hit.
My street would be considered the main street and the intersection concerned involves a short 1-block street, notably close to several schools. Countless times while I am driving down my street have jackasses pulled out of the short street and right into my path. I really cannot count the number of times I have almost been hit at this intersection. People pull out, turning left and directly into my path. People pull out to turn right and totally cut me off, to the point where I am at a dead stop in the intersection, wondering "what the hell was that?".
I've taken to driving on the wrong side of the street as I pass by this intersection, if only to allow myself more time to evade the fucktards who will inevitably pull out from the short street. I also make a point of taking a deep breath as I approach, just so I won't be caught thinking about breathing while I evade the next jerk-off to come barreling at me. It has changed who I am, it pisses me off and I'm tired of the anxiety.
I'm waiting for my day of amnesty so I can say "fuck it" and just take the hit.
Amnesty
I need a day of it. I want just one day where I don't twist myself into a vehicular pretzel avoiding your dumbass mistakes. Really, I just want to follow through and hit you when you can't negotiate a corner, can't park properly, can't change lanes properly, can't merge worth a shit, make bad lane change choices, yield when you should be merging, dart out in front of me & drive too fucking slow in the fast lane. It's as simple as that. I want you morons to feel the consequences of your actions. I'm not looking to kill you, despite that fact that on many occasions only by the grace of my driving skills have you been allowed to escape with your life. I'd like a day off of being your savior on the road and just let the fenders & bumpers fall where they may.
I'm tired of looking out for you. Really, really tired.
I'm tired of looking out for you. Really, really tired.
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